What Do I Need To Write On My Wedding Invitations?
I get asked fairly often what information couples should give their guests, so here’s a handy guide for writing your wedding invitations. Before you get going, you’ll need know a few things:
When you’re getting married
Where you’re getting married
Whether you’re inviting all guests to the whole day, or if you’ll need evening reception invitations too
What accommodation is available
How many guests you’re inviting, and how many to which part, so you can tell your stationer.
A few tips before we start:
Select your tone early on. Are you having a laid-back day or a more formal affair? Your language can reflect this and it gives guests a good indication of the feel of the wedding ahead of time.
Do as much work as you want to, not what you feel you have to. If you don’t want to hunt down flight times and hotel prices, there are polite ways to guide guests without you running yourself ragged.
If you’ve sent a Save the Date, you can post* your invitations closer to the wedding. Check down at the bottom of the article for when we recommend you let your guests know what’s what, depending on the length of your engagement. *We’ve said ‘post’ as a catch-all. You may been sending them via email, video, text…!
Remember - you don’t need an invitation per person, just one for each household!
With this list, we’ve tried to group information together assuming you have a booklet, series of postcards, a folder - something like that. You may well have a unique format for your invitations, but you can still use the following as a guide.
Main invitation
This can be very formal, very relaxed or it may strike a balance somewhere in the middle. Our experience is that if parents are making a large financial contribution towards the wedding, they’d often like to be mentioned, which makes it quite formal. If you’re paying for everything yourselves, or you’d just like to have a more colloquial tone, the invitation usually comes straight from you two.
This part should include the day, the date, the time it starts, the venue and the town. If you’re moving between two venues for the ceremony and reception, you could mention this too. Here are some examples:
A formal invitation
[Your parent's names] cordially invite you to witness the marriage of their daughter*
[Your name] to [Your partner’s name]
on Saturday 8th August 2020
at 12:30pm
at Hensor House, Buckinghamshire
*/ son! Traditionally, the first name would be a woman’s name and the second a man’s, as the bride’s parents would be paying for the wedding. Luckily, we don’t live in such a restrictive world anymore, so whether you want to re-order the names, you’re in a same-sex relationship or you want to be creative with it, you can do whatever you like.
A semi-formal invitation
Join us to celebrate to marriage of
[Your first and last name] and [Their first and last name]
on Saturday 8th August 2020
at 12:30pm
at Asia House, Marylebone
Followed by drinks, dinner and dancing at Islington Metal Works, London
A relaxed invitation
[Your first name] + [Their first name] are getting hitched
on Saturday 8th August 2020
at 12:30pm
at The Fire Pit Camp, Norwich
The ceremony
We suggest providing your guests with the following information:
The full address
How to get there.
This could be light touch, like ‘Nearest tube is Oxford Circus’ all the way through to a full illustrated map.When you'd like them to get there.
It’s often suggested that guests begin to arrive 30 minutes before the start of the ceremony to allow them to chat, take their seats and avoid being late.If your venue has any policies or concerns on things like disabled access, pets or confetti
Your dress code if you have one
The parking situation
Any information specific to your venue or plans, like it’ll be a ceremony outside.
Transport
If you’re moving from one venue to another, let your guests know the details. If you’re putting on a coach, giving lifts, walking across the park or need them to hop on the bus, give them notice here so they can prepare. If your voyage is outdoors, perhaps advise they wear sensible shoes and bring a coat or umbrella. The more you can guide your guests and get them prepared for the day, the more comfortable, relaxed and happy they’ll feel!
The reception
If your wedding is all happening in a single spot, you might not need extra information on the reception specifically, other than what time the reception will conclude (see below).
If you’re having the ceremony in one venue and your party in another, here’s what we suggest to tell your guests:
The full address
Just the same as with the ceremony, let your guests know if your venue has any policies or concerns on things like disabled access, pets or confetti
The parking situation
What time the party ends, which is often called ‘carriages’. For example, you could say ‘Carriages at midnight’, which is a polite way of saying when they need to leave!
Accommodation
Perhaps you’re booking and paying for some or all of the accommodation for guests, perhaps reserving or allocating places to sleep, suggesting nearby spots to stay or simply leaving it to the guests to make individual arrangements. Whichever you choose, let them know in this section.
The amount of work you do for your guests in terms of where to stay depends on a few things.
If it’s a destination wedding, with a foreign language, difficult terrain or it’s really remote, you might like to give your guests a helping hand in planning and booking accommodation.
What information you have access to. Venues should usually help you if you ask!
How much time you have to arrange things and how many guests you have.
If you have 30 invitees flying to a small Greek island from the UK, it’s a different story to having 300 guests in your home city.
Our advice would be, do what you need to do to make people feel welcome but not so much that you’re stressed. You could be booking Air BnBs for each family, creating a list of local options with addresses and phone numbers, or you could say 'There are lots of options in [location] and the surrounding area'.
If your venues are hard to get to via public transport or by walking, make this clear here. You could include some local taxi numbers and a word about booking in advance if you think they need to.
You might be planning activities around the wedding itself, for example, meeting in the pub or having a meal to welcome people the night before, or having breakfast together on the morning after. Letting your guests know this allows them to book accommodation for the right amount of nights.
Children
You and your partner can discuss whether you would like children to come along to the wedding but either way, address the matter so it's super clear. Either it's a 'everyone is welcome, even the smallest of guests' or 'We'd love you to see it as a chance to let your hair down' type thing, but it helps people plan!
If you do have guests under 18, check with your venue about the licenses and policies. It’s also nice to provide somewhere quiet, crayons or play space for children so they feel catered for too, and their parents/guardians feel more chilled!
Food and drink
This doesn't have to be a section, but you might like to mention what you're planning, or if you have any specific things you like to let people know. For example, you're having an ice cream cart, or all the food is local from sustainable sources, is vegan or made by your mum!
Gifts
You might not want any, you might have specific gift list, you might ask guests to bring along their favourite bottle of booze, or maybe you’ve created a honeymoon fund. You can have a few words on whatever you choose, and if you're doing this through a website or PayPal, you can have the details for that too.
RSVPs
Finally, tell your guests what date you’d like them to respond by. You might be providing a card, or they might be emailing or calling you. Advise them to provide:
A response for everyone on the invite
Their dietary requirements
If they need a parking space or accommodation (if this is something you’re arranging)
What about guests who are just invited in the evening?
There will be less information for those who are invited to join in later on in the day. We suggest:
The full address of the reception venue
How to get there
Venue policies or concerns on things like disabled access, pets or confetti
The parking situation
Info on children
Info on food and drink. For example, ‘we’re providing a late night snack ‘or ‘bring cash for the bar’
Carriages
Accommodation
RSVP
You can decide if you'd like to include gift information for evening guests based on how well you know them.
When should I send the invitations out?
If you’re not sending Save the Dates, send your invitation out as soon as you can. Allow time for people to send their responses, preferably 6 months ahead of the day, as this helps you to plan more accurately with your suppliers. Here’s a rough guide on when to send out your wedding stationery, depending on how long you’re going to be engaged:
If you’re getting married within 6 months of getting engaged, let people know the date of your wedding day as soon as possible. You can do it via postcard, letter, text, email or a specifically designed card. Get your full invitation out by 2-3 months, and ask for an RSVP by no later than 6 weeks before the day.
If you’re engaged for 6 - 12 months, we recommend sending a Save the Date by month 4 and an invite by month 8.
If you’re engaged for longer than 12 months, we’d suggest holding the date with your guests by month 6 and sending an invite 3 - 6 months before the wedding day.
💖🧡💛
Got questions? Email me on carly@withbellson.co.uk or DM on Instagram and I’d be happy to help!