Top tips for prioritising your mental health whilst planning your wedding

Wedding planning can get crazy. It’s so easy to lose sight of what matters and get totally frazzled in the process. I know this because I did it myself! Guest list, table plans, venues, outfits, family dynamics and friendship politics; It’s enough to drive anyone up the wall. Remember; this is supposed to be fun, and be about you two being in love - that’s all! So let’s have a little re-centre and focus on things to make us calm, relaxed and excited about the big day ahead.

Staying calm

Meditate

Wedding planning or not, having some down time to quieten your racing mind is always a good thing. I find it hard to do this without a voice leading me, so I use the app Headspace. It takes you through meditations for various times and scenarios, and even helps you drift off to sleep at night. Regularly checking in with yourself can help balance you and bring some peace.

Exercise

You may love to run, swim, dance or play a sport - and then you’ll already know the restorative feeling you get from exercising. You may be more like me (whose fave part of yoga is savasana - the bit at the end when you get to lay down). In which case, a sunset walk or a few gentle stretches might be more tempting, and can reset you for the next bit of wedding planning. Even better, you can do this with your partner and make it more fun!

Shelah Marie

Disability and Me

Give fewer shits!

Easier said than done, I know. My top tip here would be follow the mantra ‘What if I do nothing?’ So if a task or worry comes up around wedding planning, ask yourself that question. More often than not, you’ll come up with ‘reasons’ why you need to work, but keep asking yourself why. If the answer is ‘because people are expecting it’, sack it the hell off. Your day, your rules.

Staying on top of it

Organisation

You don’t need to be a hardcore freak in the (Excel spread-) sheets or avid mood-boarder. But I guarantee you will feel calmer and happier if things are written down and visualised. It’s helpful to know what’s been done, what’s still to do and set deadlines for tasks. Just do bite-sized chunks at a time.

If you’re not sure where to start, I’ve written a blog post about what you might want to organise for your wedding. My absolute top tip here is using a Trello Board. Trello is a free organisation tool which you can access online and via an app. It will allow you to collaborate with your partner so you can both see what’s going on. You can add links, images, notes and comments, set deadlines and you can colour code and label things too. It’s super easy to pick up and will save you a whole heap of stress. Here’s an example of a Trello board for a couple who are wedding planning -

Kaylina Norton

Delegation and team work

You don’t have to do it all alone! You will burnout if you pile yourself up with jobs and don’t ask for help. Haven’t got your RSVPs back yet? Ask your parents to chase people. Need to put together the table plan? Get your wedding party round for cheese and wine and do it together. Don’t know how to dress the venue? Hire a kickass wedding stylist who will do it all for you. You don’t have to carry the weight of organising on your own. In my experience, people love to help because they are so thrilled to be included in your plans.

Remember you’re doing this together. Reward yourselves when big things like booking the venue are ticked off. If you’re getting upset at each other about anything, take a break from planning and do something to blow off steam together.

Don’t do more than you have to

I have had so many couples looking up recommendations for accommodation, flight times from various airports and taxi numbers to help their guests. This is nice, but it takes time, so if you’re running low on that, don’t feel you have to do these things.

Everyone has access to Google these days, and folks tend to organise themselves more than you might think. Older guests might need a helping hand, but you don’t need to go above and beyond for every single person attending your wedding. Do as much as you enjoy doing and then forget the surplus work.

Having fun

Date nights

This is something we could all do more of, I’m sure. When I’m in the midst of a project or find myself busy with balancing work, children, the dreaded laundry pile and sleep - my partner gets shoved down to the bottom of the list.

Spending time together, preferably outside the house, helps us reconnect. A trip to the theatre, a pub quiz, dance class, cooking together - It always makes us feel closer and happier, whatever we do when we make time for us. We just need to remember to put away our phones and be present with one another to make it really worthwhile!

Top tip: We’ve started using The Adventure Challenge - Couples Edition. We scratch off date ideas and photograph what we’ve done to create a book of memories. It’s really great fun and makes a lovely keepsake too. All the date ideas so far have been original and we’ve enjoyed them - I laughed a lot at J making a key lime pie with a blindfold on!

Love and Latitudes

Focus on each other

Sometimes we need a little reminder as to why we are pumping our heart, soul and money into a wedding. However big or small your celebration will be and whether you’re chilled about it or on the brink of a breakdown - remind yourself why you’re getting married. It’s them; That’s all that matters.

Lindsey Newton

The day’s highlights

You can make it through any stress when you focus on the goals. There will be key moments on the day that you can look forward to, and this will help get over any potential bumps in the wedding planning road.

You may or may not have these, but here are some ideas of exciting and happy points to anticipate:

• Your first look at each other on the day

• Walking back up an aisle as a married pair

• Funny and sentimental speeches and toasts from family and friends

• Hitting the dance floor with your best mates

• Going off on honeymoon

In times of worry when you’re planning, know it’ll all be worth it when you get to do the things you both really want to do on the day. Every wedding looks different, and rightfully so. We are all unique, and so are our relationships - and therefore the ways we chose to celebrate them. Now go have fun, lovebirds!

Rachel Leiner

Have you got any tips, questions, worries or comments? Leave me your thoughts and share with anyone who might need to read this!

Should I do DIY wedding invitations?

You might be thinking of making your own wedding invites, baking your own cake or sewing your own outfit for your wedding. I have a sneaky hunch that your main reason for doing this will either be to save some money or to have some sort of creative control over how things look.

When I got married I made a whole bunch of retro-style cushions for a chill out space (I talk about that more here) so I have definitely been in those shoes! I’m gonna run through the pros and cons of doing a DIY wedding and you can then be well-informed to decide if it’s the route for you!

The benefits

Saving money

This has to be the number one driver I hear for people wanting to create their own wedding stationery. There are loads of resources for inspiration, like Pinterest, and shops stocked with tools and materials. The price for plain cards, envelopes, ribbon and twine will seem tempting - as long as you don’t factor in your time!

It can also be fun popping along to Hobbycraft or a similar store and choosing bits to get crafty with. My advice here would be to plan both the style and your budget ahead of going to arts and craft outlets, otherwise you might find you spend more than you’d like! Believe me, it’s hard to resist the many types of washi tape, eco glitter and coloured papers when it’s all tantalisingly close!

Image and product by Sweet Pea Studio

Image and product by Oak and Ivory

Creative control

Another top reason for wanting to DIY your wedding is that you get to have your hands on every piece of it. You and your partner can make your vision come to life by literally crafting it all from the ground up. As a self-confessed lover of being in charge, I totally get that.

For fun!

If you are crafty and creative, or if you are handy with InDesign, Illustrator, Photoshop and the like, then getting down to designing on your own wedding stationery suite can be REALLY enjoyable. It can be special too - something that you and your partner or wedding party get to do together. My tips here would be to really do your research on what elements you need and make sure you’re aware of preparing for print, colour modes and available finishes and techniques.

Reusing and recycling

You might be trying to have a more eco-conscious wedding - and this is commendable! There may be ways you can reuse paper and other materials to create your wedding stationery or recycle and upcycle details such a furniture, wedding favours and outfits. This is a great idea, not only for planet Earth but it might also make for a really unique aesthetic (as long as that’s what you’re into!).

Be aware though, that by not adequately planning ahead, buying everything new from craft stores and making invitations, you might actually be creating waste, so make sure you get the balance right.

by Swell Anchor Studio

by Folksy

The drawbacks

Extra work and stress

Once again with the cushions (and the place cards, and the favours, and the post-ceremony biscuits) at my own wedding… I look back and think, ‘Did I really need to make them all myself?!’. I was STRESSED and frankly, although I have the graphic design string to my bow, sewing and baking are not strengths of mine. Things ended up with that sort of unskilled, ‘made with love’ look - except I didn’t love it at all, the making or the output. Every time I sat down to sew a new retro cushion cover, I regretted not just buying or renting some, or ditching the whole idea all together. There was a LOT of swearing!

Rustic aesthetic

You might want this - in which case it certainly isn’t a drawback at all! However, if you’re looking for a fresh, modern style but you don’t personally have (or have the time, will and patience to gain) the skills to make it happen, then it’ll be VERY hard. There are places online, like Etsy, where you can buy templates to fill in and print yourself, which can at least lend a design you absolutely love. The stress here is being able to print and finish it to a high standard.

Photo by Jen Marino

Photo by Jen Marino

It might not save you money

If you get going on your DIY stationery and then later decide it’s too much work or you’re not getting the desired effect, you might well end up employing someone to do it for you anyway. This wouldn’t be ideal, and it creates extra wastage and money spent. I’d say only DIY if you’re happy and have the confidence to see it through!

Reasons to employ someone to do it for you

Creative control without the stress

A good supplier will be able to balance what you want with what you didn’t even know you wanted. It’s their job to guide you, advise you and surprise you - to make you fall in love with their products and services. You will still be at the helm, but they’ll be your co-pilot. They’ll have a wealth of knowledge and experience that’ll take the worry out of the process, whilst keeping you in charge.

Professional finish

Whether it’s a florist, a baker, a seamstress or a stationery designer - the suppliers you choose will have a whole portfolio of examples to show you the quality of their end product. Having spent many hours toiling away at their specific craft, they’ll be able to offer a finesse that might be harder to achieve if you try to do it yourself.

Photo by India Dobson, flowers by My Lady Garden

Bespoke or customisable

Each supplier will also be able to offer you a service that is completely unique to you. This might be in the form of bespoke items, or heavily customised from something they already have. They’ll be able to guide you based on your budget and preferred style.

Speed

Wedding suppliers have the tools and materials ready to get going and can deliver your products in a speedier fashion than you might be able to get it done yourself. They’ll also have the knowledge and relationships with other suppliers to pull elements together - such a specific printers or flower wholesale vendors.

Storage

Often vendors have workspaces and areas to store your products to make sure they’re at their best. This could be the physical space to cut and fold your stationery, or climate-controlled rooms for keeping flowers of cakes super fresh.

Image of Jenny Cookies by Kelly Clare Photography

Image from Lucy Can’t Dance

Conclusion

You might have written off buying services and products because of your budget, but I would say where there’s a will, there’s a way. You don’t have to have lots of everything - You could have a small centrepiece cake that you get made professionally, surrounded by little homemade fairy cakes. You could find a charity shop outfit but have it altered by a seamstress to make it fit you perfectly. You could get a graphic designer to create you a custom stamp, but then use card blanks and ink pads to make the physical items at home yourself. There are methods of combining DIY and reusing materials with employing help that can combine to make your day perfect for you.

As with all wedding planning - if you WANT to make your own wedding stationery/cake/outfit etc because it’ll be fun, then do. If you’re not sure about it or it sounds stressful, then ask for help! Send me a message if you want extra advise - I’m always happy to answer your questions! Carly x

NO DANCING?! 10 fun ideas for your wedding reception that don't involve a dancefloor

This article was originally written during the Covid-19 pandemic, and was catered towards couples who were getting married when there were still a lot of rules around socialising, social-distancing and a restricted guest count. It’s framed with this in mind, but the ideas all still stand regardless of Covid. You might not want a dancefloor, not have room or just want to break free of expectation - all of these are valid and your wedding day should just be about how you want to celebrate. I hope these ideas help and inspire you to do it your way!

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Restrictions on weddings are finally lifting and we are all raring to celebrate safely together again. You might be really disappointed that after waiting all this time, you’re not allowed to even sing and dance at your wedding reception - and rightly so. But before we let ol’ BoJo dampen our spirits, let’s take a look at some alternative, Covid-rule-compliant entertainment that your guests can throw themselves into.

It’s worth noting before we kick off - Everyone coming to your wedding is:

• So excited, happy and grateful to be part of your day, especially after they know how you’ve waited, booked-rebooked, stressed and worried;

• Not there to judge you;

• Supportive of you;

• Wants to have a good time and will go with the flow.

Please don’t pile pressure on yourself or stress over what other people will think and do. My personal experience showed me that everything you could catastrophise in your mind whilst planning - yeah, it doesn’t happen. People want to support you and are going to be keen on rolling their sleeves up and mucking in. Besides, dancefloors aren’t everyone’s cup of tea, and they do not the party maketh! Ours was actually empty a lot of time - not close enough to the bar for some of our guests!

With that in mind, what can you do at your wedding reception if you’re not allowed to dance?

1 Video of your first dance

Okay, so public group dancing hasn’t got the green light, but there’s no ban on you two dancing in your own kitchen. Set up your fairy lights, prop up your smartphone, play your song and dance. Then at the reception, play the video on a big screen or even get your wedding party to batch-text it to people to watch at the time you would have danced. It’ll be a cute momento for guests and could even include a thank-you message in it too.

Photo by Sarah Brookhart

2 Pub quiz

During lockdown, quizzes via video chat took off in a big way, eh?! It wasn’t just the devout pub quiz team either - seemingly everyone had a go, however Zoom-phobic they might have felt! It’s easy to plan in advance, there’s loads of material online so you don’t have to start from scratch. You can add more of a personal spin with questions about where the couple met and things about their relationship. Try to strike the balance between sentimental and funny, just as you would with the speeches.

3 Pimp your speech

Speaking of which - there’s probably a little extra space for these to be a more elaborate source of entertainment, should you wish. I get it - standing up in front of a whole bunch of people to perform is some people’s idea of hell on earth. However, if you have a groomsman who does a bit of stand up, an aunt who puts together one hell of a slideshow or even a beatboxing bridesmaid - now’s the time to call in some favours! These could end up being some of the most memorable, personal and fun elements of the wedding if you have people in your wedding party who are up for it.

Image by Rawpixel on Shutterstock

Photo by Shari + Mike

4 Build-your-own-cocktail bar

You all knew that at some point this list would turn to booze, right?! Never fear - it could include virgin options too. Your venue might be able to help you here, so ask them if they have a mixologist or even someone who can flair - that’s always a great show when done well! Your bartender could mix up some base cocktails, like gin and tonic or prosecco, and your guests could add fruits, syrups, botanical garnishes and - lest we forget - cocktail umbrellas!

Photo by Natalie J Weddings

5 Photobooth

Okay, so you’ll need to be able to sanitize props in between uses and socially distance. Hang or prop a backdrop somewhere, get your guests to pose and hey presto - it’s a photobooth! You could even include some tape measures or metre rulers as a cheeky nod to the rules. It’s easy to send round a Dropbox link or have an open Facebook album if you’d like people to share their snaps after the day.

by NeonWorldCustom

6 Treasure hunt

Whether it’s Easter eggs or The Crystal Maze - hunts are FUN. You can also plan this and set it up ahead of time so it’s zero stress. You could hide pictures of you as a couple, miniature bottles of booze (unless there are kids around), sweets, bar tokens… Get creative and ask your wedding party to help out too.

7 Lawn and fairground games

Bowls, giant chess, ring toss, jumbo Jenga, a coconut shy, hook a duck… There’s lots of fun games you can play outside and some venues even have these in place themselves. You can organise them yourself, borrow from friends or hire items. Again, you just need a little preparation to keep things sanitized between uses.

Photo by Jacob Malinksi

Photo by Jacob Malinksi

8 Parlour games

I always just thought this was confined to Cherades - which, by the way, is a great go-to. There are others though - like Six Degrees of Keven Bacon (this name made me chuckle) - which would be fun in small groups. You could write prompts and rules and get each table to play games together. They’re great ice-breakers too! Here’s a good list of different parlour games. Not everyone drinks alcohol or wants to drink a lot of it but I’m pretty surely a creative mind could turn any of these into drinking games should each group fancy it!

9 Bingo

Ah, Bingo, so simple and yet very immersive - People get very competitive and excited for something that really is a game of chance! You can personalise this by having phrases the couple say, pics of them in different holiday spots, names or images of the people in the wedding party - basically anything goes! You could have food and drink prizes that are easy to organise and it’s a game that anyone can play.

10 Fireworks and sparklers

A fantastic way to send off the couple AND it’s outdoors - win win! Even before the pandemic, it was the most magical end to a wedding I’d experienced (especially the bride’s reaction as the groom had organised it as a surprise!) A bright, happy moment to end a memorable day.

Photo by Claire Penn

Have you got other ideas? Or any questions? I’d love to hear what you think and as always, if you need anything - just get in touch! Carly x

Photo credit - Top image of couple and confetti is by Epic Love Story.

A - Z of common wedding terms

Have you been planning your celebrations only to stumble across a phrase and think, “What the hell does THAT mean?! Do I need that?!”

Unless you work in the wedding industry or plan events professionally, you may not know your cummerbunds* from your corkage, and that’s okay. When I was engaged, I was CLUELESS and I found the wedding-planning lingo hard to follow.

Well, you can relax. This handy glossary of terms will fill in the gaps, so you can crack on with party-planning!

Altar

In days gone by, this exclusively meant the table at the front of a place of worship, and if you’re having a religious ceremony, this still stands. If you’re not, it means the place you stand during the ceremony where all your guests can see and hear you make your vows to each other.

The can be as simple or as over-the-top as you want!

via Festival Brides

Bouquet

A bunch of flowers, usually tied with string or ribbon. It’s common for a bride and a bridal party to have a bouquet each, but you can choose if you all have them, you dot them around the venue or not have them at all! They can be fresh, dried, artificial or made of paper or felt.

Photo by Jenny Markham

Image by Daze Photography & Film

Button holes

These are little bunches of flowers pinned to the lapel, or pushed through the button hole, of a suit jacket (or equivalent place on whatever you’re wearing!)

Image by Daze Photography & Film

via I Heart Buttons

Canapés

Yes please! These are little appetisers like a cracker topped with something tasty or a delicious small snack served on a spoon or a stick. Something you can pop in your mouth and enjoy in between all the mingling.

You tend to serve them once people arrive at the reception but before the main meal starts (see below: ‘Wedding breakfast’) to fill a hole and quite frankly keep people sober from all the merriment.

via Temptation For Food

via The Every Kitchen

Carriages at midnight

It’s a very old-fashioned term, but basically it means ‘Please book transport home at midnight’ - or put more simply, this is when the party ends. It’s meant to be polite, but it’s so archaic that it confuses lots of people.

My advice is scrap the term, and simply pop something on your invitations something less formal, that feels friendly and more like you. For example, ‘We can’t wait to celebrate our day with you, all the way ‘til midnight!’ (or whenever your wedding celebrations end).

It’s usually determined by your venue, and it’s handy to let your guests know this on the invitations or wedding website as it allows them to plan ahead.

Celebrant

This is the person who leads your ceremony. They’re different to a registrar because they tailor your service to you (and you still need a registrar to actually make it official). An enthusiastic celebrant can make the difference between the plain exchange of ‘I do’s and a really meaningful, personal and engaging ceremony.

via Nat Raybould - Celebrant

Centrepiece

These are something pretty to look at in the middle of your table. My advice would be to skip these on your actual dining table, or make them low-level or transparent as experience will attest that all they do is block your view of the people sat opposite you.

This can make things extra awkward if your guests have never met each other. If they’re trying to be polite, they’d be bobbing around trying to peek at each other and make chit-chat through the centrepiece, and who wants that?! Here’s a nice example:

Photo by Emilie May

However, if you were having a dessert table, you’d probably make a wedding cake the centrepiece. It’s basically the item you’d like the most attention to be given to amongst a collection of other things.

Corkage

This is a cost that a venue will charge you to open bottles of alcohol. This only happens if you have a dry hire wedding (see below). It’s important you ask about this and factor it in to your budget because it can be a sudden shock if you’re not aware of it!

Cake topper

A figurine of the two of you, a sign with your names on, a lego model of Hogwarts… (just me?!)…A cake topper is simply an object you place on top of a cake. Think of it as the wedding equivalent to birthday candles. It just says “I am a wedding cake”, but of course you don’t need one! It’s your choice.

via Nouba

Photo by Jessica Grace Photography

Day-of coordinator

These people are angels. They’re hyper-organised, high-energy folk (the kind that actually DO have clipboards) who make sure your day runs smoothly. They allow you to actually participate in your wedding, rather than just host. You work with them before the day so they know all the timings, the whats and wheres, and they work the whole day long to make it happen. Not a must-have, but highly recommended!

I really rate both Jump The Broom and Devine Bride for this job!

Destination wedding

Basically a holiday and a wedding rolled into one! A destination wedding is one that you have abroad. Sometimes the celebrations last a little longer and as well as the wedding day, the couple host a few days of get-togethers and activities.

Dry hire

A dry hire venue is one that allows you use of the blank canvas space, but doesn’t have in-house catering or a bar. In this circumstance, you need to find people to come in and make (and serve) food and drinks. Opting for this gives you more flexibility in terms of where you get married but there’s more organising to do, too. A wedding planner (see below) can really help with this, but of course you can do it yourselves.

Escort cards

I would do these if a couple requested them, but they’re less common than a table plan and place names (see below) because, in my opinion, they’re more confusing. They’re little cards laid on a welcome table that have the names and table number of each of your guests on, to show them where to sit.

The reason I prefer a table plan is because a guest can see their name on a list and sometimes the table plan even shows where that table is located. I’d argue finding your name in a sea of cards is harder!

They can be branded to match all of your other stationery.

Favours

These are little gifts you give your guests as a token of thanks for coming to your wedding, and often they’re placed on their spot at the table. Think candles, wildflower seeds, chocolates - just something small they enjoy on the day or take home with them.

I’ve collaborated with Grant + Blossom to make hand-poured candle favours which actually match the same style as your stationery, like invites and menus. You can check those out here.

Head table

This is the table where the brides, grooms and their families tend to sit. It’s common to have this table somewhere everyone else can view, so it’s easy for them to watch and listen to speeches, if you do them. Some people call it a ‘top table’.

Hen do (and Stag do)

This is a pre-wedding party to celebrate your engagement with your best mates and close family - a last hurrah of sorts. People tend to split it so all the people who identify as women (the Hens) have a separate party to their male counterparts, the Stags. Nowadays you do what you want, and mixing the groups is sometimes known as a Sten or Hag do.

If you ned help planning one of these, because you’re a bridesmaid, groomsman, Maid or Mate of Honour (see below), then I’ve put together some top tips just for you.

Master of Ceremonies

Also simply ‘The MC’, this is your friend or family member who is the loudest, most charismatic, and can herd all your guests through the milestones of your wedding. They often have a microphone, and at key points of the day, like when dinner is served, they let everyone know. It can really add some flare to your day if this person is warm, funny and likeable. Which I’m sure all of your mates are!

Mate of Honour (and Best Woman)

A Maid of Honour is someone who a bride picks to be their chief bridesmaid, and they identify as female. A Mate of Honour is the male equivalent. It’s a lovely title because if you’re a bride-to-be and your best friend or sibling isn’t female, they still get to be an official member of your wedding party.

A Best Man is chosen by a groom to do that same job for them, and is, as it says on the tin, someone who identifies as a man. A Best Woman is a groom’s main go-to who is female.

On the day stationery

I like to just call this ‘wedding day stationery’ because I think it’s more self-explanatory! These are order of service sheets or booklets, place names, table plans, escort cards, menus, welcome signs and anything else paper-based that you use to give your guests the information they need to navigate your day and venue. It’s ideal if they all match in terms of colours, fonts and styles so that your guests can easily recognise them.

Photo by Caroline Opacic

Open bar

Something your guests might love but your bank balance might not! An open bar means that your guests keep their purses and wallets closed and that you provide all the drinks for free. It’s very advisable that you tell the bar to cap it at a certain limit, for obvious reasons!

Alternatively, you could have certain drinks be free and others available to buy. Sometimes a couple brews their own beer or makes their favourite punch, but ask their guests to pay for cocktails, wine and spirits.

Order of service

This is a document, usually a booklet or sheet, which tells your guests what is happening on your wedding day, in order. It could be just for the ceremony or it could cover the whole day’s festivities.

It might contain details of a reading, like the title, who wrote it and who is giving it, or even the lyrics to a song or hymn if you’re hoping people sing!

Palette

This is just a fancy word for your colour scheme. It really sets the mood for the day - muted tones feel relaxed and bright hues with high contrast imply it’s time for a party! If you’re struggling to choose a style for your wedding, read this blog post.

Place names

These are little cards you place on each table setting, and each one has an individual guests’ name on it. It helps them to find their seats for the main meal (see Wedding breakfast).

Photo by Lex Fleming

RSVP

An acronym for the French ‘Répondez s'il vous plaît’, it simply means ‘kindly respond’. An RSVP card is a piece of stationery that allows your guests to tell you whether or not they can make your wedding. There’s often space for dietary requirements and occasionally a tickbox for them to say they’d like to stay at the same accommodation as the couple.

You can provide a stamp and envelope or they can use their own. You can also have a RSVP via email or text if you want to save on paper or need a quick response.

Save the date

Just like an RSVP, these are also a simple piece of card. You send them in advance of your main invitations, and they just ask your guests to hold that date in their diaries.

Sending these ahead of a main invitations allows you to secure a date and maximise your chances of everyone you want to come being available, without you having had to plan every detail of the day first.

Stationery suite

My numero uno, my true love - the stationery suite 🖤 This is all your matching paper bits that ask your guests to come to your wedding, tell them the details, help direct them on the day and thank them afterwards. Stationery suites can include:

• Save the dates

• Invitations

• Information cards

• Envelopes

• RSVPs

• Orders of service

• Welcome signs

• Table plans

• Table names or numbers

• Place names

• Escort cards

• Food menus

• Cocktail menus

• Thank you cards

Photo by Lex Fleming

Sweetheart table

This is a bit like a top table but it’s set for two. It’s an intimate set up for the couple, which in retrospect, I think we would have enjoyed at our wedding. We got married and then were so busy hosting, we didn’t really spend any time together until the next day!

Photo by Map + Compass

Having that moment to really take it all in would be special and give you that chance to take a breath before the party really kicks off.

Tablescape

This is the table in it’s entirety. It can look breath-taking when everything comes together. Breaking bread with your loved ones is so special, and a well thought-out tablescape can not only be an ice-breaker for guests meeting for the first time, but it’s a beautiful backdrop for all those little magic moments.

It’s where the guests eat, where they listen to, and toast to, your speeches about how much you love each other, and - if they’re so inclined, it’s usually where they start to get a bit merry!

Tablescapes can include:

• Plates

• Crockery

• Cutlery

• Glasses

• Tablecloth or linens

• Napkins

• Centrepieces

• Flowers

• Candles

• Menus

• Place names

• Table names/numbers

• Favours

via Ruffled

Photo by Stephanie Green

Table plan

This is a big poster you put at the entrance to where people will eat. It has table names or numbers, each with a list of guests’ names and it shows them where to sit. Depending on your venue, most tables seat 8-12 guests each.

If you’re having a more relaxed day, perhaps with street food or a buffet, then you don’t need one of these as people will take a seat wherever suits them. If you do opt for more formal dining, often your venue can provide an easel to prop the poster up on - make sure to ask them before purchasing one yourself.

When we were planning our wedding, creating our table plan was a long ol’ task. We wanted everyone to feel comfortable, and we had to factor in accessibility issues, single guests who didn’t know anyone and those dreaded ex-couples who wanted to keep their distance!

If you have a table plan, it’s really useful to plot it out so at least one gregarious, welcoming person is sat on each table to get the conversations going! You can even plant ice-breakers on each table, like questions to ask each other, if you want to.

Usher

An usher is another word for a groomsman (but they can be male or female). They simply welcome your guests to your ceremony, help the elders find a seat and could be in charge of the ceremony music.

Wedding breakfast

This is the main meal on your wedding day. It’s called a breakfast to indicate it’s your first meal as a married couple, even though it’s most likely to be served in the late afternoon or evening. It’s a funny phrase and probably the most common confusing term in this whole list!

Photo by Bless Photography

Wedding party

All your favourite people! This is bridesmaids, groomsmen, both sets of parents and you, the couple.

Wedding planner

This might be the same angelic person who is running your on-the-day coordination. They help source suppliers, negotiate with the venue and take charge of all the wedding admin (or ‘wedmin’, if you like) so you can focus on being happily engaged.

These are particularly helpful if you’re having a big wedding or a destination wedding where you don’t speak the language, because a native speaker is a real asset to have on board. You can also find dry hire specialists who really know their stuff on blank canvas venues.

Wedding stylist

These are very creative people who can pull together backdrops, tablescapes, seating areas, flowers - you name it - to style your day consistently. A stylist can be the difference between a pretty wedding and a jaw-dropping one. Just hand them a moodboard and see what they can do!

Photo by Caroline Opacic of Zuza McKen - WholeLottaLove Weddings

*Cummerbunds

These are so uncommon, but just in case… It’s that crazy bit of material round the waist, as part of a suit. If you want ‘em, you do you!

via Cat Poland

If I’ve missed something and you want to ask me about it, then please get in touch. I’d love to help and hear about your plans!

Carly x

How Do I Plan a Hen or Stag Party?

Often this can seem as daunting a task as the wedding: A party, a sleepover, potentially awks team-building and a holiday all in one! It doesn’t have to be as complicated or as expensive as you imagine to throw your bestie the event they deserve, nor does it have to be cheesy or leave you penniless, either. Just follow our basic tips! We’re going to cover:

• Why have a Hen or Stag do?

• What is a Hag or Sten party?

• Writing your guest list

• Setting expectations and group communication

• Planning your budget

• Duration and availability

• Choosing a location, and your accommodation and travel

• Planning activities

• Eating and drinking

• Atmosphere and ice-breaking

• Where to look for some extra help

Let’s jump in!

Why have a hen or stag do? 

The days of strictly hetero marriages, with no sex beforehand, immediate baby-making after “I do”, and the associated last hurrah are, thankfully, over. So, are ‘last night of single life’ parties part of the past too?

Hey, they’re not for everyone, but another reason to raise a glass to two people in love seems like a happy thing in my book. You do what you want, don’t bow to anyone’s expectations.

Having said that, I do urge you to consider the possibility of having a hen or stag party, if you’re not already swayed. All too often, it seems the reason we duck out of some of the wedding prep - trying on those fancy dresses, allowing friends to plan a pamper sesh, having a party thrown for us - is because we don’t believe we deserve the fuss. YOU DO, okay?!

What is a Hag or Sten do?

It’s pretty neat - It’s just a joint pre-nuptial party, where you don’t separate groups based on gender. We were keen on a big group party at Go Ape! (a tree-top adventure playground) when we were engaged. We were so easily talked out of it for strict girl/boy time (plus half of my bridesmaids were a straight up “NO” to hanging out of a tree). If you two fancy a Sten party, hold your ground and go for it!

Writing your guest list

First thing’s first - who do you want to invite? It can depend on the type of event you’re imagining. If you want L plates, strippers and body shots, contemplate for a moment what that picture looks like with your Auntie Brenda front and centre. Invite appropriately and brief your bridesmaids and groomsmen, if they’re planning the party for you, to make sure no activities are planned which will make people feel awkward, embarrassed or left out.

TOP TIP
My recommendation would be to keep the guest list to your wedding party and close friends. Weddings can already be fairly expensive and it’s difficult if guests feel pressure to pay for an extra party on top. Groups of large people in confined spaces are difficult to manage too!

Setting expectations and group communication

If you’re going big - say you’re dreaming of a week-long tropical getaway, make that clear to guests up front. It will make planning, budgeting, communication and therefore rapport so much smoother and more enjoyable for everyone involved. I’d say the longer and more elaborate the party is, the pricier it’ll be, and therefore you might expect a smaller group of guests to be able to come along. Just like with planning your wedding, you would hate to find out hidden costs along the line, so make sure it’s crystal what your hopes and plans are to avoid any potential stress.

You might want to set up a WhatsApp group chat, a private Facebook event or just organise things by good, old-fashioned email. I’d opt for the WhatsApp group, as it gives people a chance to see profile pics and get to know each other before the event.

The most common fear I hear when brides talk about their Hen do is whether the pockets of friends that are being brought together will all get on well. I’ll talk later about ice-breaking, but I really would recommend you factor that in to your activity, location and meal planning. Interestingly, the principle concern I hear from Stags is usually regarding their eyebrows being shaved off when they sleep…🤨

TOP TIP
Keep it simple. A meal, some drinks, an accessible activity like bowling - that’s all you need. Complicated can lead to disappointed!

Planning your budget

Think about how much you’d be willing to spend for a night out or weekend away for your friend. We have a tendency to get so excited about getting married that we may lose a little perspective, but just imagine you got invited to 5 hen or stag parties this year. How much could you realistically set aside for all these events? Think about your friend’s financial situations and what is fair to expect of them. The people present are more important than the place you’re in. 

The way I’ve seen it done before is the main party planner asks the guests how much they’re willing to spend first using something like a Facebook poll. Once the results are in, they research possible locations and activities based on that. This means there’s no awkwardness or drop-outs based on cost, which is a sad reason not to go to a party.

TOP TIP
Include a kitty within your budget. This can pay for essentials in the shared accommodation or cover all food, drink, travel, activities and any gifts for the whole weekend. Any leftover can be given back evenly after the event.

Duration and availability  

Ask your guests how long they are willing to be on a Stag or Hen party. It could be a Saturday afternoon, or a week-long affair. If it’s the latter, guests will need to check their holiday allowance and book time off work or arrange suitable childcare, which makes organising tricky. Plan months ahead rather than weeks, giving everyone a fair chance to being able to make it.

TOP TIP
A cool free tool for seeing overall group availability is Doodle. You pop in all possible dates, share with the guest list and people can select the dates they can make. Simply pick the most popular day in the poll and you’re set!

Choosing a location, accommodation and travel

You’re modern people, you know about Air BnB for places to stay and  Skyscanner and Trainline for cheap travel options. However, you might be missing a trick if multiple guests are coming from the same place but are travelling separately. You can save some serious cash by booking group train tickets (you could save over a third with GroupSave!), or even hiring a minibus. Plus, if you’re like me, planning a playlist and snacks for a road trip is actually part of the fun!

Remember to factor in that people will have to travel from all over to meet at your chosen location, which means their personal pay-out to be there will be different from the next guest. I’d recommend selecting a town or city that is accessible to everyone and doesn’t cost more than £70 to get to.

Self-catering options will not only be more budget-friendly than hotels if you’re going away for a few days, but you can even buddy people up who don’t know each other to be in charge of cooking certain meals together. Make sure you book somewhere which allows Hen and Stag parties, as some companies have stringent rules about this sort of event.

It’s really great if the place you stay has some sort of communal area for you to all hang out, play games and eat together. A major reason for having a party like this before the wedding is to get everyone to bond. Funny challenges and silly games bring people together brilliantly so it’s great to have a space for this.

TOP TIP
If you’re staying in a house or cottage all together, plan meals in advance and book an online shop. Don’t forget essentials like loo roll, toothpaste, tea bags, olive oil, salt and pepper.

Planning activities

Try a mix of feel-good things to do, raucous fun and something sentimental for a great party!

Pamper the group by getting your nails done together, or stock up on pizza and everyone’s favourite movies for a cosy night in. Throw in some laugh-your-head-off good times: Learn a Spice Girls routine, swing round a pole, do karaoke or try a cookery class. Lastly, some cute keepsakes like a Polaroid scrapbook of the party and some stories of how you met the couple will keep it personal and special. 

TOP TIP
Not all activities have to cost money. You could distribute the budget by planning a free competitive scavenger hunt challenge in the morning, followed by luxury spa treatments after lunch. 

Eating and drinking

We’ve already mentioned group cooking, but I cannot emphasise enough: You must plan for people being hungry! People need to eat, and you don’t want hangry to crush the vibes.

Preparation is paramount. Get the groceries for things like breakfast, lunches, treats and drunk-snacking. You can then plan to eat out as specific activities. This not only breaks up the weekend, but when eating is part of the entertainment, you save a few quid too. For example, you could book an afternoon tea one day and dinner and drinks another. If you’re relying on take-out for a meal, make sure you plan options in advance, with all the phone numbers you might need. You could even, if you’re super organised, cook up a big lasagne the night before the party and bring it along, allowing you to toss a side salad and host with no stress.

TOP TIP 
Make sure you find out allergies and preferences before you meal plan so everyone feels included and catered for. Don’t assume everyone wants to get boozey and ensure there are tasty soft drinks available too!

Atmosphere and ice-breaking

Well, you know who’s coming, where you’re going, what you’re doing, what you’re eating and how much it costs. Now you’re going to have a bunch of people in a room, a mix of school friends, uni and work pals, cousins and even parents and it’s your job to make sure everyone has a good time. Eek!

Set the tone with an awesome playlist. If you can get there first and set up some welcome snacks and drinks, that always loosens people up. Make sure you remember everyone’s names and when new faces show up, do the introductions so they’re instantly welcomed into the fold. Play some games, top up glasses or jump straight into your first activity because the sooner people start chatting, the better!

Real life example
My Maid of Honour left a pair of socks from one of the 4 Hogwarts houses and some chocolates on everyone’s pillow as a welcome present. The houses were used as teams for games throughout the first night - everyone shoved their socks on immediately, no questions asked! The Harry Potter theme continued with decorations, costumes, ‘potions class’ cocktails, Butterbeer-pong and me eating my way through an entire bowl of sparkly green vodka jelly to retrieve a Horcrux 😂. The point is, not everyone there loved HP the way I do, but the theme was sentimental, and the games got everyone on board quickly.

TOP TIP
When everyone arrives, toast to the bride and/or groom. It’ll remind everyone why they made the effort - they’re the link that connects you all!

Extra help

There are awesome companies out there who not only plan the whole thing for you, but take care of asking each guest for their share of the payment, making it less awkward for you. Cluck is a great example, offering hen do packages for modern brides that include stays in cool London hotels, blow-dry parties and bottomless brunches. 

I love, love, love party planning. If you want some advice or ideas, just get in touch! Happy planning!

How Do I Choose a Style for My Wedding?

It’s daunting to select just a single way of representing you both aesthetically for one big day. You’re complex, but the look of your wedding can pull out just a few parts of both your personalities without looking messy. It’s all about a balance of backdrop, details and atmosphere.

The Backdrop

By this, we mean:

• The venue - the space you’re all going to occupy

• The amount of people coming (and therefore the level of intimacy of the event)

• The guest dress code, if you have one

• The venue’s table, chairs, exterior, the walls and foundations - textured vs smooth walls, graffiti etc

All of these things will set the scene for the day. If you want a pretty summer garden theme, it might not work so well in an old warehouse by a canal. Selecting a venue you LOVE will give you some big clues as to what to choose for your day’s overall style. It’s the biggest visual tool you’re going to have!

Fazeley Studios in Birmingham

Ashridge Great Barn in Devon. Photo by Clare Kinchin

The Details

These bits can cover:

• On-the-day stationery like your welcome signs, menus, place names, table names

• Favours, if you choose to have them

• Decorations like a photo backdrop, bunting, pom-poms, wall-hangings

• Practical objects like tablecloths, napkins, crockery, cutlery, glassware

• The transport you choose

• Your cake

• Your outfits, shoes, accessories like jackets and jewellery

• Your hair and make up choices

• The flowers you choose

• What you show of your usual day-to-day look: Tattoos, coloured hair, that necklace you wear and everyone recognises as yours etc.

These details not only overlay on top of the backdrop, but are the parts which are really from the heart and make the day feel like ‘you’. You can play with so much colour and texture here and really have some fun with it. You can DIY a whole bunch of it, delegate to the wedding party over a few wines or get some external help. There are 👏so 👏 many 👏awesome wedding suppliers who can help you with these finer details. Here’s a few of my faves:

Table linens by Sand Snow Linen

Iridescent wine glasses by Anthropoligie

Embroidered veils by Ink & Thimble

Paper decorations by Rachel Emma Studio

Chocolates and cakes by ARD Bakery

The Atmosphere

This is more than just the look - it’s how your day feels. It can include:

• The music you choose, including if you have a band

• Any other entertainment - magician, fire dancers, arial performers… Go wild!

• The scent - many venues let you burn incense, candles or use diffusers if you ask them to

• The food you choose and how it’s served. This could be food trucks, pizza boxes, grazing tables and buffets or a sit-down 3-courser. They all create the atmosphere - be it formal and fancy or super chilled.

Grazing platter by Amaze & Graze

Aerial hoop performer Marieka Jackson

Incense collection via The Gem Picker

Choosing a Style

Doing this brings all those visual cues together. Take the venue as the foundation, and then think what you like about the place. Brainstorm some things that really matter to you both and see how they’d play out in a style and whether they correlate with each other and fit well with the backdrop, too.

Try not to be literal - if one of you loves West Ham Football Club and the other is big into knitting, you don’t have to knit everyone a West Ham scarf as a favour. But, you know, you can! However you might like to have pops of claret, light blue and canary yellow in your flower arrangements and stationery instead, which give a nod to the Hammers but don’t dominate the day. You could knit some bunting or ribbons to hold knives and forks together and people will know this is made with love and genuinely represents you both.

The difference between a style and a theme is that a style mixes a combination of foreground and background visual inspiration to create an overall aesthetic and vibe, but a theme is more literal. For example, a style is something loose like ‘Celestial’, a theme is more direct, like ‘Baz Luhrmann’s Romeo + Juliet’.

Here are a few more examples of how you might plan a style or theme:

Travel

As a theme: You might incorporate stamps, flags, airmail envelopes and maps

As a style: You might have more of a nod to land, sea, sky and time through floaty dyed tablecloths and using grass, tropical plants, sand, water, wood, shells and stones in your centrepieces

Photo by Catalina Jean

1950s

As a theme: Think petticoats, quiffs, Teddy boy jackets, Grease soundtrack, set in an old-school diner

As a style: More like a red lip and a netted birdcage veil, a retro car like a Chevrolet Bel Air, a 50s-inspired font like Syrup and pretty faded pastels for contrast

Starry birdcage veil by Crown and Glory

A Pink Table Setting by Otto Maya via Conde Nast

Photo by Jill Reger

Disney

As a theme: That yellow Belle dress, tables named after specific characters, a Mickey Mouse cake, horse and carriage as transport

As a style: Flowers displayed under a glass bell, candelabras, pumpkin centrepieces, soft princessy linens, chiffons and silks

Photo by Karina Leonenko

Sundried flower bells by Ginette et Ernest

Plant-dyed material by Cocortez

Summary

To round it up, my advice is to find balance. Negative space gives the important details room to breathe. You don’t have to blast every element and plaster every surface to get the point across. No one will look at the forks and think, “That fork is SO Ashley and Joel”, y’know? Find colours and textures you BOTH like and create a mood board with something like Pinterest, which is packed full of inspiration.

You might have been able to tell that I’m more of a fan of style as inspiration rather than a cut-and-dry theme or scheme. For me, I think it leaves plenty of room for you both to shine - it’s the stage you set but not the show. However, as always, I fully support people doing their day their way, so take want you want from this and run with it!

If you’re stuck on the big picture, ask for help! There are loads of suppliers who are wedding styling experts who you could chat to at wedding fairs and on Instagram, and you can always email me on carly@withbellson.co.uk for some FREE chat and advice. I’d love to help!

What Do I Need To Write On My Wedding Invitations?

I get asked fairly often what information couples should give their guests, so here’s a handy guide for writing your wedding invitations. Before you get going, you’ll need know a few things:

• When you’re getting married

• Where you’re getting married

• Whether you’re inviting all guests to the whole day, or if you’ll need evening reception invitations too

• What accommodation is available

• How many guests you’re inviting, and how many to which part, so you can tell your stationer.

A few tips before we start:

Select your tone early on. Are you having a laid-back day or a more formal affair? Your language can reflect this and it gives guests a good indication of the feel of the wedding ahead of time.

Do as much work as you want to, not what you feel you have to. If you don’t want to hunt down flight times and hotel prices, there are polite ways to guide guests without you running yourself ragged.

If you’ve sent a Save the Date, you can post* your invitations closer to the wedding. Check down at the bottom of the article for when we recommend you let your guests know what’s what, depending on the length of your engagement. *We’ve said ‘post’ as a catch-all. You may been sending them via email, video, text…!

Remember - you don’t need an invitation per person, just one for each household!

With this list, we’ve tried to group information together assuming you have a booklet, series of postcards, a folder - something like that. You may well have a unique format for your invitations, but you can still use the following as a guide.

Main invitation

This can be very formal, very relaxed or it may strike a balance somewhere in the middle. Our experience is that if parents are making a large financial contribution towards the wedding, they’d often like to be mentioned, which makes it quite formal. If you’re paying for everything yourselves, or you’d just like to have a more colloquial tone, the invitation usually comes straight from you two.

This part should include the day, the date, the time it starts, the venue and the town. If you’re moving between two venues for the ceremony and reception, you could mention this too. Here are some examples:

A formal invitation

[Your parent's names] cordially invite you to witness the marriage of their daughter*

[Your name] to [Your partner’s name]

on Saturday 8th August 2020

at 12:30pm

at Hensor House, Buckinghamshire

*/ son! Traditionally, the first name would be a woman’s name and the second a man’s, as the bride’s parents would be paying for the wedding. Luckily, we don’t live in such a restrictive world anymore, so whether you want to re-order the names, you’re in a same-sex relationship or you want to be creative with it, you can do whatever you like.

A semi-formal invitation

Join us to celebrate to marriage of

[Your first and last name] and [Their first and last name]

on Saturday 8th August 2020

at 12:30pm

at Asia House, Marylebone

Followed by drinks, dinner and dancing at Islington Metal Works, London

A relaxed invitation

[Your first name] + [Their first name] are getting hitched

on Saturday 8th August 2020

at 12:30pm

at The Fire Pit Camp, Norwich

The ceremony

We suggest providing your guests with the following information:

• The full address

• How to get there.
  This could be light touch, like ‘Nearest tube is Oxford Circus’ all the way through to a full illustrated map.

• When you'd like them to get there.
  It’s often suggested that guests begin to arrive 30 minutes before the start of the ceremony to allow them to chat, take their seats and avoid being late.

• If your venue has any policies or concerns on things like disabled access, pets or confetti

• Your dress code if you have one

• The parking situation

• Any information specific to your venue or plans, like it’ll be a ceremony outside.

Transport

If you’re moving from one venue to another, let your guests know the details. If you’re putting on a coach, giving lifts, walking across the park or need them to hop on the bus, give them notice here so they can prepare. If your voyage is outdoors, perhaps advise they wear sensible shoes and bring a coat or umbrella. The more you can guide your guests and get them prepared for the day, the more comfortable, relaxed and happy they’ll feel!

The reception

If your wedding is all happening in a single spot, you might not need extra information on the reception specifically, other than what time the reception will conclude (see below).

If you’re having the ceremony in one venue and your party in another, here’s what we suggest to tell your guests:

• The full address

• Just the same as with the ceremony, let your guests know if your venue has any policies or concerns on things like disabled access, pets or confetti

• The parking situation

• What time the party ends, which is often called ‘carriages’. For example, you could say ‘Carriages at midnight’, which is a polite way of saying when they need to leave!

Accommodation

Perhaps you’re booking and paying for some or all of the accommodation for guests, perhaps reserving or allocating places to sleep, suggesting nearby spots to stay or simply leaving it to the guests to make individual arrangements. Whichever you choose, let them know in this section.

The amount of work you do for your guests in terms of where to stay depends on a few things.

• If it’s a destination wedding, with a foreign language, difficult terrain or it’s really remote, you might like to give your guests a helping hand in planning and booking accommodation.

• What information you have access to. Venues should usually help you if you ask!

• How much time you have to arrange things and how many guests you have.
  If you have 30 invitees flying to a small Greek island from the UK, it’s a different story to having 300 guests in your home city.

Our advice would be, do what you need to do to make people feel welcome but not so much that you’re stressed. You could be booking Air BnBs for each family, creating a list of local options with addresses and phone numbers, or you could say 'There are lots of options in [location] and the surrounding area'.

If your venues are hard to get to via public transport or by walking, make this clear here. You could include some local taxi numbers and a word about booking in advance if you think they need to.

You might be planning activities around the wedding itself, for example, meeting in the pub or having a meal to welcome people the night before, or having breakfast together on the morning after. Letting your guests know this allows them to book accommodation for the right amount of nights.

Children

You and your partner can discuss whether you would like children to come along to the wedding but either way, address the matter so it's super clear. Either it's a 'everyone is welcome, even the smallest of guests' or 'We'd love you to see it as a chance to let your hair down' type thing, but it helps people plan!

If you do have guests under 18, check with your venue about the licenses and policies. It’s also nice to provide somewhere quiet, crayons or play space for children so they feel catered for too, and their parents/guardians feel more chilled!

Food and drink

This doesn't have to be a section, but you might like to mention what you're planning, or if you have any specific things you like to let people know. For example, you're having an ice cream cart, or all the food is local from sustainable sources, is vegan or made by your mum!

Gifts

You might not want any, you might have specific gift list, you might ask guests to bring along their favourite bottle of booze, or maybe you’ve created a honeymoon fund. You can have a few words on whatever you choose, and if you're doing this through a website or PayPal, you can have the details for that too.

RSVPs

Finally, tell your guests what date you’d like them to respond by. You might be providing a card, or they might be emailing or calling you. Advise them to provide:

• A response for everyone on the invite

• Their dietary requirements

• If they need a parking space or accommodation (if this is something you’re arranging)

What about guests who are just invited in the evening?

There will be less information for those who are invited to join in later on in the day. We suggest:

• The full address of the reception venue

• How to get there

• Venue policies or concerns on things like disabled access, pets or confetti

• The parking situation

• Info on children

• Info on food and drink. For example, ‘we’re providing a late night snack ‘or ‘bring cash for the bar’

• Carriages

• Accommodation

• RSVP

You can decide if you'd like to include gift information for evening guests based on how well you know them.

When should I send the invitations out?

If you’re not sending Save the Dates, send your invitation out as soon as you can. Allow time for people to send their responses, preferably 6 months ahead of the day, as this helps you to plan more accurately with your suppliers. Here’s a rough guide on when to send out your wedding stationery, depending on how long you’re going to be engaged:

If you’re getting married within 6 months of getting engaged, let people know the date of your wedding day as soon as possible. You can do it via postcard, letter, text, email or a specifically designed card. Get your full invitation out by 2-3 months, and ask for an RSVP by no later than 6 weeks before the day.

If you’re engaged for 6 - 12 months, we recommend sending a Save the Date by month 4 and an invite by month 8.

If you’re engaged for longer than 12 months, we’d suggest holding the date with your guests by month 6 and sending an invite 3 - 6 months before the wedding day.

💖🧡💛

Got questions? Email me on carly@withbellson.co.uk or DM on Instagram and I’d be happy to help!

What Do I Need To Plan For My Wedding? - Part 2

💖🧡💛This is part 2 of 2. If you missed the first part, you can find it here. At the end, you can download a summarised list to help you plan your special day! 💖🧡💛

In the last post, we talked about planning the who, what and where of the wedding: The bare bones, if you will. This post will be about styling your event to make it scream you as a couple, transforming it into sentimental, special and, of course, fun. Let’s kick off!

Your Outfits

Often we put a phenomenal amount of pressure on ourselves to look THE BEST WE EVER HAVE OR WILL on our wedding day - I certainly did. It’s not really fair to future you and it’s definitely not a healthy outlook. You need to look after yourself! Eat well, do some exercise, don’t beat yourself up, please. That’s all I’ll say on that.

You can feel like a million dollars in the right outfit, but it certainly doesn’t have to cost that! I was incredibly lucky to have a step-mum who is a seamstress and she crafted my dream broderie-anglaise dress from 50 quid’s worth of material from Walthamstow market. I’m not saying you have to make your wedding outfit, but do consider these options:

• Lots of high-street and online brands such as H&M and ASOS now have bridal collections

• You can hire suits and dresses from a range of stores

• You can find amazing things from rooting around vintage and charity shops - This would also be a fun day out. You can also try Etsy or eBay!

• Some boutiques have huge discounts and even run competitions to win items from their collections

• If you’re looking for something a bit alternative like a coloured wedding dress, you may find it’s cheaper than the traditional white dresses which come with a premium

• You may be lucky enough to have a gorgeous hand-me-down from a family member, have the skills to craft your own or know someone who is a tailor. Ask around!

💖🧡💛

Your Wedding Cake

…or cheese, or pork-pies, or donuts…Whatever you like! It’s a tradition that makes lots of guests happy because, well, people like treat food. Choose something you love - Even if it’s a pile of pizza. 🍕🍕🍕And if this isn’t for you, then that’s cool too.

💖🧡💛

Your Flowers and Decorations

This is a good opportunity to own the aesthetic. It can differentiate your wedding from the rest and compliment the clothes, stationery and venue you’ve chosen. Some tips:

• You don’t have to buy fresh - You can get paper, felt or fabric flowers which could be re-used, sold on or given away to guests. Having decorations like this allows you to plan and place ahead of time, too.

• If you want fresh flowers but at a cheaper price, ask the florist to pick seasonally and up to a certain price. They can often be very creative based on just a colour suggestion.

• Ask if the venue has any ‘props’ or decorations and really use the space you’ve chosen.

• Don’t forget that the stationery you’ve chosen will be present and therefore will offer a lot of visual weight in the room. This might be all you need!

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Your Music and Entertainment

You might be having a band, a string or barbershop quartet, a DJ or just a banging Spotify playlist. Whatever you choose, work together to create a soundtrack of music that matters to you. I asked on the RSVPs for songs that meant something to each guests. This meant they all had something to talk about, a reason to hit the dance floor, and it made our job of organising the music much easier!

I’ve also been to weddings with magicians, jazz pianists and karaoke - all have worked amazingly well at entertaining everyone!

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Your Wedding Stationery

Oh so dear to my heart! It my very firm belief that unique, meaningful and beautiful design can change an event, a brand or a home into something to cherish. It can mean the difference between people feeling welcome, comfortable, relaxed and happy - or not.

I’ve written a post on what stationery you might need here. In brief, you don’t need to spend the earth to have something bespoke. Your wedding is just about you two, and your stationery - a save-the-date or an invitation, is a guest’s first glimpse into that intimate event. Send them something that truly shows them what sort of celebration they’re in for! 🤘🤘🤘

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Photography and Videography

Capturing the day is the most wonderful keepsake. You could encourage guests to use their phones and cameras, hand out disposables, use Instax/Polaroids and of course, hire professionals.

There are so many wonderful, talented and friendly photographers and videographers who would really understand you as a couple and capture that magic. My tips:

• Talk to your professional photographer multiple times before booking them to make sure they’re right for you

• Use selective directories such as The Unwedding’s Book of Love, which has already narrowed down the best ones on your behalf (and often have discounts!)

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Should I hire a wedding planner?

There are some REALLY amazing ones out there who will do their job so seamlessly that you float into your wedding day totally chillaxed. The worst thing that you can do when planning a wedding is lose yourself in it. It’s unbelievably easy for even the most organised and relaxed person to lose perspective of their priorities when wedding planning.

If you need help, whether it’s from a professional planner or not, just ASK. The worst that can happen is someone says no! Just remember why you’re doing it and focus on the one you love. 💖

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And that’s about it! You may have some extra details which are bespoke and special to you, but that’s the bulk of organising. Overwhelmed? Don’t be - you’ve got this!

To make it even easier, I’ve created a list collating everything in this and the previous post so you can keep check of all your different elements! Get your FREE checklist here!

What Do I Need To Plan For My Wedding? - Part 1

Hello! I’ve unashamedly sat down with a cup of tea and a hot water bottle because cosy evenings are what it’s all about at the start of December. Talking to couples and researching online, it seems one of the most anxiety-inducing parts of getting married is that they don’t know where to start with their planning, and the cost seems beyond imagination.

I’ll start the same way as I did in this post when I talked about what stationery you might choose. You don’t NEED to do any of these things. Your wedding is your day to celebrate each other, so pick and mix the bits you like. That being said, let’s crack on with the possibilities.

💖🧡💛This is part 1 of 2. In the second post, you can download a summarised list to help you plan your special day! 💖🧡💛

The Date

Choosing when you want to get married depends on a few things:

• When you got engaged

• How long you need to plan and save

• What your plans are

• Where you’re getting married.

If you have your heart set on an outdoor wedding in your home town in Lancashire, maybe don’t do this in winter. If you need to save up to pay for your wedding from scratch, I’d suggest not having a short engagement as you’d stress yourself out. It’s also possible that you’d want to choose a sentimental date, like your anniversary.

True story: We got married in February because of my fear of wasps - and that meant I knew none would buzz in and ruin things! 🐝

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Your Budget

According to Hitched, the average total cost of a wedding in 2019 was £31,974. That can seem very daunting to most, and rest assured I can tell you we had a beautiful day that didn’t cost anywhere near that much. Your budget is personal to you - Don’t go beyond what you can afford!

My advice here is that you make the day memorable, fun and unique based on the people present rather than anything aesthetic or based on finances. It’s a celebration of your love and promise to each other, so try not to get lost in material things and bankrupt yourself. I would highly recommend creating a spreadsheet to keep track of your spending to ensure you keep with your limit, and even set budgets for individual sections (outfits, flowers, food, stationery etc).

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Your Guests

The day is MADE by the ones who come to bear witness, show support and give you all the 💜. You may choose just one person each, which is the legal obligation in the UK, or a whole heap of loved ones. Factor in who you think would support you as a couple and would be happy for you. Try not to be swayed by friends or relatives to invite people who don’t fit that description. If your budget is smaller, remember you can:

• Invite people to just part of the day

• Have some cheaper options for feeding your guests, like buffets or bring-your-own dishes

• Simple one: Just don’t have an open bar!

Once you know who you want there, make sure you get their addresses or email addresses (depending on how you’re going to send invites) and store them in one place for ease.

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The Wedding Party

It’s so exciting to pick your bridesmaids/bridesmates/grooms-people/flower girls/page boys. It’s even more exciting to ask them! There’s often some politics or pressure around this about being left out but I have a few bits of advice:

• Keep numbers minimal of you can, because if you choose to buy your wedding party outfits, it could get pricey with a whole gang!

• Choose the people who know and love you as a couple

• If you have a Maid/Mate of Honour or Best Man/Woman, it’s very tempting to just choose your bestie or the person you’ve known for the longest time. Those roles are somewhat labour-intensive before and on the day. Whether it’s organising a hen/stag/sten do, herding guests, giving an appropriate speech or helping older relatives find their seat, you need a wedding party who is reliable and organised.

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The Ceremony Venue and Vows

The truth this, you can spend forever swooning over flower crowns or show-stopping suits on Pinterest but at the end of the day, the ceremony is the only part of any wedding day you plan that ACTUALLY matters. It’s the difference between being married and not! Whether you tie the knot in a religious building, a secular registry office or outdoors, it’s the one price you have to just shell out, no negotiations. The main factors to consider here:

• How many people will fit?

• Can you afford it?

• Will everyone be comfortable? For example, can everyone sit down, will they need umbrellas/blankets?

• How easy is it to get to?

• Is it accessible to everyone? Remember older guests, those carrying babies and those with mobility issues.

• Can people easily get from the ceremony to the reception? See the Transport section below for more on this!

• What legal tasks do you need to complete to get married here? Remember, if you’re getting married in the UK you need to “give notice of intent to marry’ at least 29 days before the ceremony. More on that here.

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The Reception Venue

Some people know where they’d want to get married and they negotiate a free date, and others know the date and find somewhere which is available. There’s no right or wrong here, it really depends on your priorities. What I would consider is the needs of your guests - Refer to your guest list and make sure you’ve factored in accessibility for those who are less able to move around and whether the venue allows children or pets, if you’re inviting them. Do your research - Look at images, whether they’ve hosted weddings before, testimonials and ask if they do tastings.

Key things to think about with your venue:

• Does it fit your budget? If you love it but can’t afford it at the weekend or at peak times, will they decrease the price for mid-week/off-season weddings?

• What does the price include? Do you need to pay extra for linens, cutlery, crockery, audio-visual set up or anything else?

• Will they set up and take down for you?

• Do they have space for dancing?

• Can you bring your own drinks/cake/anything else you fancy?

• Are you tied into their catering or list of approved caterers?

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Table-Planning and Food

Your venue might handle all of the catering, you might provide your own, or you might organise something like food trucks for your guests to enjoy. If the reception venue isn’t covering the food, make sure you try different options with tasting sessions and book that in too.

Table planning, in all honesty, is one of the tasks that’s more of a head-scratcher to complete. Often there will be awkward numbers, or people who can’t be near each other, or accessibility considerations. But who doesn’t like a bit of a problem solving session?! Keep your cool, and you’ll work it out. My top tips:

• Write each person’s name on a piece of paper and pin them to a board or use magnets on your fridge to move things around until they make sense! This is much easier than writing them in a notebook or typing them about as you can see results really quickly.

• Have some spare blank name cards made up in whatever stationery style you’ve chosen to allow for any last minute changes to your guest list

• Don’t get your table plan printed and mounted ages in advance. Allow for flexibility and you’ll be less stressed nearer the wedding day!

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Transport

This can include getting the wedding party to the ceremony, getting everyone in between venues and getting home. Again, it depends on your budget but try to remember people who don’t know the area or who might need a little extra help. Families with children might be bringing car seats and prams and there may be walking sticks and wheelchairs to factor in to your plans.

Bus hire is a popular choice because you can transport a large number of people at once. Often you can get your names printed for the front of the bus, too! When I got married, we hired a vintage Routemaster for our guests and a 1960s-style white cab for us. It was romantic to have that breather with my new husband but we missed out on the fun of the big red bus, which everyone said they loved!

My top tip here? If the journey isn’t long, don’t splash cash on drinks and snacks. They’ll get that when they arrive at the ceremony. I spent hours making branded biscuits (really much harder than it needed to be!) . And throw in the copious amounts of Prosecco we were handing out? Our guests came wobbling off that bus at the other end! 🍾🍾🍾

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Accommodation

I honestly would only recommend sorting this for:

• The wedding party, if it’s a destination wedding

• Older guests who are from out of town

• If your venue is also the accommodation and you can bulk-book rooms

• You’re having a festival-style wedding with camping

You can certainly make suggestions of areas to stay, but I don’t think you need to burden yourself with where each guest lays their head that night. The logistics are difficult and stressful and in my experience, everyone finds somewhere to rest after the big day!

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Hen/Stag/Sten Parties

If you’re having one, it’s a possibility that this would be organised on your behalf. It can be anything from a drink and getting your nails done with some pals to a big holiday abroad. My suggestions:

• Just like your wedding, it’s the people who make the event memorable rather than the ‘grammability of the affair. Don’t price out your mates for a big blow-out.

• Just focus on your nearest and dearest - the ones who are ecstatic about your upcoming nuptials.

• Remember why you’re having this party - It’s the lead-up to the big celebration of your love. Perhaps have a hen/stag/sten (where everyone goes out together rather than a single-gender event) which reflects that too!

• Don’t have one if you don’t want one! You can choose what you want to do and you don’t have to bow to tradition.

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The Speeches

The thing to plan here, other than the words to say, is who is going to talk. Do not by any means think that it should be just three men. This is traditional, yes, but oh-so-very archaic. That’s not a judgement - You do you! But don’t be held back here if you’ve got something to say!

My top tips for wedding speeches:

• Don’t make them too long - people get fidgety

• Try to balance laughter with some vulnerability, sensitivity and sentimentality

• Don’t mention embarrassing stories about each other than you’ll cringe about if you caught your Nanna’s eye whilst saying it

• Even if it’s true, don’t say ‘I only wrote this last night/this morning’. Frankly, it sounds lazy and a thinly-veiled attempt at trying to hide nerves. Just hold your head up, speak loudly, and own what you’re saying. You’ll be great!

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So, that covers the people, legal and venue sections of your plan, and a little about saving. In Part 2, we dive into more about the style of your wedding. We’ll chat outfits, flowers, entertainment and of course, stationery. Tune back in next week!

What Wedding Stationery Do I Need?

Congratulations if you’re engaged! Nothing makes me happy the way a couple-all-jittery-about-getting-married does. It’s an exciting time, but as many fiancées will tell you, it feels like a lot to plan and you can easily get overwhelmed. Not only does it seem like there’s a million things to think about and organise, but of course you’re not going to be expert at getting married, so let me lend you a hand.

First up, you don’t NEED anything. Your wedding day should reflect your relationship and what you love. Try not to feel pressured into tradition or what other people say. With that aside, I’ll tell you the basis of what each part of stationery in a suite is for. Then you can decide what you need!

Save the Dates

What are they?

The name is on the tin with this one, but it still might be complex to navigate in terms of what to say and when to send it. Save the Dates are usually very simple. They say your names, the date of the wedding and usually the city (and country if it’s not where you live). They encourage your guests to clear their diaries and ensure they can come to your wedding. Here’s an example:

SAVE THE DATE
Karina & Antonia are getting married!
11th April 2020
in Seville, Spain
Invitation to follow

You can of course add simple details and use whichever formatting of numbers and wording you prefer.

When should we send Save the Dates?

My recommendation would be as soon as you’ve chosen the date, and potentially booked the venue. This will mean the foundations are in place. If there’s another element to your day you can’t live without, like a specific band you just need there, for example, then make sure you have that sorted too. The basic rule of thumb is, as soon as you can!

What format should the Save the Dates be?

Any format you like! The most basic is a text message or email, but my advice is that people see it as a more formal and important occasion when they receive post. A simple one-sided postcard would do the trick!

When might we not need Save the Dates?

If you’re newly engaged but you’re getting married very soon, say the next 6 months, you could probably skip straight to the invitations. Equally, if you plan only to invite someone to the evening, you may decide not to send them a Save the Date card.

What budget should we have for Save the Dates?

This depends on the quantities, time frame, complexity of design and finishes. The more you have and the more intricate the design - we’re talking bespoke watercolour illustrations, coloured foils, that sort of thing - the higher the price. However I would say that Save the Dates should take up 10 - 15% of your wedding stationery budget.

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Wedding Invitations

What are they?

Your wedding invitations are both a formal way of requesting the presence of your guests at your wedding and giving them the information they need. This will help them decide whether they can make it and also how to navigate the event - especially if you’re organising entertainment on the days before or after.

When should we send Wedding Invitations?

This can vary on a few factors. If you’re having a destination wedding, people will need to know as soon as possible what the details are for travelling and staying abroad. They might also have to plan Visas, jabs and child/pet care so I’d recommend sending invitations for a wedding like this as soon as you’ve nailed down the ceremony and reception venues and the accommodation (if you’re providing it).

It’s extra work, but it’s also really helpful to provide some flight suggestions and remind your guests not to keep checking online for this information as it makes the flight prices go up for everyone!

If you’re getting married closer to home, then 6-9 months before your wedding would be my recommendation. Don’t panic if this isn’t possible, you can always get things sorted with quick turnarounds. If you think it’s too stressful to wait for things to fall into place before posting paper invitations, you can opt for a digital solution. You can have a website and email your guests when details are updated. Bear in mind though that older guests may not be so savvy with tech!

What format should the Wedding Invitations be?

Wedding invitations can be a booklet, a series of info cards, a website, a folded poster… The digital and paper-goods possibilities are endless! It’s really up to you, how much information you have and what your aesthetic is for your wedding.

RSVPS

What are they?

Whether it’s a text message, email, postcard or letter, your RSVPs allow your guests to respond to your invitations. The acronym stands for ‘Répondez s'il vous plaît’, which is French for ‘Please respond’. You can ask your guests to let you know however you like, but it’s quite popular to get them to either email a specific address you’ve set up or fill out a card you’ve included with the invitation.

With their response, they’ll need to tell you whether they can come, and often whether they need accommodation, and what their meal choice is. This can be as simple as just including their dietary requirements.

What budget should we have for Wedding Invitations and RSVPs?

This depends on the same factors as your Save the Dates. Invitations are more complex and detailed than a simple card. If you opt for paper invitations, remember to consider finishes, quantities and postage costs. If you opt for a website, factor in hosting and domain costs and the on-going up-keep. Wedding invitations should take up 45-50% of your wedding stationery budget.

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On-the-day stationery

What are they?

On-the-day stationery covers all the paper goods that help your guests work their way around the event. It covers welcome signs, orders-of-service for the ceremony, maps, signposts, table plans, menus, place cards, table names or numbers and/or escort cards. I’ll outline these below!

Welcome signs

What are they?

These are posters or banners that are placed at the entrance to your venue(s). They have a nod to the ‘branding’ your guests have come to recognise is yours, and are very simple. Something like:

WELCOME TO THE WEDDING OF
Karina & Antonia
11th April 2020

We’re so happy you’re here!

Orders-of-Service

What are they?

Some couples have these as booklets for the ceremony, especially if it’s a religious affair as they can contain hymn lyrics or passages. They can include the order of what is going to happen, like prayers, vows and readings and they can list who is in the wedding party. Other couples incorporate this into their welcome sign if it’s a list of timings for the whole day. For example:

3:15pm - Cocktails and canapés
5:00pm - Wedding breakfast
6:30pm - Speeches
7:30pm - Let them eat cake!
7:45pm - Hit the dancefloor!
9:30pm - Hot snacks
12:30 - Carriages

Table plans, menus, place cards, table names or numbers, escort cards

What are they?

I’ve bunched these together because they’re in the same realm of stationery for the day. All of them direct guests where they’re sitting to eat - you won’t need these at all if you’re having a relaxed buffet-style meal where anyone can sit where they like! It’s sometimes nice to have a planned table for a few reasons:

1. You can plan in advance for wheelchairs, highchairs and anticipate any potential accessibility issues to make your guests feel as comfortable and stress-free as possible

2. You can mix up social groups to get your guests to mingle

3. A sit-down meal feels special and relaxed before the festivities ahead.

Once again though, I encourage you to do what you both want and what your budget allows!

Okay, so here’s an explanation of each thing:

Table plans - These show a map of each table, it’s name, vague location and who is going to be sat on it

Menus - These display what’s on offer for your guests to eat. Often they’ve chosen well in advance so they might like something to jog their memory!

Table names or numbers - This simply differentiates one table from another. Often couples choose names which reflect their over-arching wedding theme, such as cities, books or films.

Escort cards - These can be displayed on a welcome table and incorporate both the guest name and table name/number on to one card.

What budget should we have for On-The-Day Stationery?

This depends on which items you choose, quantities and materials. Some couples opt for a perspex or wood welcome sign, for example, which is more expensive than paper. I’d recommend setting aside 30-40% of your wedding stationery budget.

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Thank You Cards

What are they?

These not only thank your guests for coming along to your wedding, but for any gifts they may have given you too.

What format should the Thank You Cards be?

Again you can opt for email, but I’d really push for something printed here as a keepsake. You could choose your favourite wedding photograph or something memorable about the day. In one wedding recently, the groom surprised the bride with fireworks, so they chose to reflect that in their signature illustrative style on their thank you cards.

When should we send Thank You Cards?

When you get a chance amongst that post-wedded bliss! If you’re waiting for the photographs to come back, going on honeymoon and adjusting to married life, I anticipate it’d be 4-6 weeks after you tie the knot.

What budget should we have for Wedding Invitations and RSVPs?

I’d recommend saving 5-10% of your wedding stationery budget for thank you cards, including postage.

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My Top Tips

Whatever you choose to do, your wedding stationery can really reflect you both. Don’t opt for run-of-the-mill - get one-off suites that are truly bespoke and embody your love story.

Make your aesthetic consistent. Once you’ve settled on your look, carry it through everything. It’ll get guests excited on the lead up and help them on the day as they’ll be able to recognise signage. If you do choose to have on-the-day printed stationery, then this helps build the visual style across your venue and will be reflected in all of your beautiful wedding photography.

If you’re into social media, create a fun hashtag so that photos taken by your guests on the day are collated together. You’ll do lots of mingling and hosting so it’s amazing to look back at the magic moments around the room that you might have missed. Put that hashtag on your stationery before and during the event to encourage your guests to use it and capture the whole journey in one feed.

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As ever, I’m here to answer your questions and help you on your way. Just get in touch!

Dreamy Wedding Transport 😍

Getting you and your guests to the right place on time is pretty crucial, and you’ll want to do that in style! Here’s a collection of my fave transport pics to swoon over.

marycostaweddings.com

.jenjenkinsphotography.com

juliasalbum.ru

pphgcharleston.com

heychrisrandle.com

thesoftseason.com

.click4reg.co.uk/blog/alternative-wedding-transport/

anyakernesphotography.com

anyakernesphotography.com

tobylowephotography.co.uk

michaelnewingtongray.com

jclemon.com

Rainbow Wedding Inspiration

Today has flip-flopped from an optimistic sun peeping out to grey and wet and all manner of things in between. Despite the rain, I’m super happy today because after a small hiatus working on some exciting apps and dashboards for my other business, I’m back full-whack in WBO-mode. Basically, I’ve returned, with bells on 😉So to celebrate my good mood and the combo weather situation, I’m looking at all things rainbow.

jessicahuntphotography.com

crownandglory.co.uk/

brihammond.com

jamesmelia.com

radandinlove.com

scottclarkphoto.com

amygrayphoto.com

elciervo.co/cake-design

liveviewstudios.com

.luckyink.co.uk

ohhappyday.com

popsugar.co.uk

annapumerphotography.com

Herbal Wedding Inspiration

Often weddings incorporate flowers into the styling, but what about herbs? They have the added benefit of being particularly scented, competing with, or often complementing, their floral counterparts,. They offer a range of stunning shapes and colours, too. Best of all, they don’t wilt - Bonus!

If herbs are part of your theme, here’s a collection of ideas to help you weave it in to a consistent aesthetic throughout your wedding style.

Stationery

It may be an illustrative or photographic approach, or you may prefer the real thing! Whichever style you use, keep it as a common theme throughout your design decisions to keep it neat. Your guests will then come to know your ‘branding’ and know where to look for information.

via zazzle.com

via paperculture.com

via plumecalligraphy.com

via paperlust.co

via theknot.com

via paperlesspost.com

Buttonholes and bouquets

via weddingforward.com

via marrygrams.com

via weddbook.com

via modwedding.com

via purewow.com

via thenaturalweddingcompany.co.uk

via rockmywedding.co.uk/

by Dasha Caffrey

Food and drink

via adilynnwedding.perniaspopupshop.ru

via theviewfromgreatisland.com

via hollyandflora.com

via confettidaydreams.com

via fancy-edibles.com

via theviewfromgreatisland.com

Décor

by Sera Petras Photography

via weddingchicks.com

via whimsicalwonderlandweddings.com

via stylemepretty.com

via tulleandchantilly.com

by HBotanics Weddings

via bkwinery.com

It’s worth looking into the meanings of different herbs and flowers, as this can mean some sentiment is wrapped up in the style you choose. You can make the smallest details so special to you as a couple - and these nods to you both may even take centre stage. Happy planning!

Top 5 European Destination Wedding Venues

This is so indulgent, but hey - It can’t hurt to look. I’ve lusted after stunning landscapes, tropical weather and venues oozing with that something special. Here’s a collection of my faves!

This Must Be The Place, Barcelona

Let’s start with a bang! This beautiful venue is just an hour outside of Barcelona and Girona, and was set up by a couple who left London to pursue their dream. This Spanish farmhouse, or ‘finca’ has stood proud since the 14th Century and now plays host to weddings, yoga retreats and parties.

All images courtesy of the venue.

Chateau of Arcangues, French Basque Country

Located close to the Atlantic coast and the Spanish border, this French stately home was the first house of the Lord of Arcangues and Curutcheta in 1150, who gave his name to the village. To this day, the d'Arcangues family has been living on the same location.

Photography by Matthias Toth

Frafjord, Norway

Having visited Norway as part of my honeymoon, it’s not concrete that it’s one of my favourite destinations to visit. The Fjords are absolutely breathtaking; there’s a magic about the air and the atmosphere that’s truly electric.

These images of Henriette & George’s wedding shot by Simon Buck give you a flavour of place so wonderfully.

Theros Wave Bar, Santorini

If you’re looking for something a little warmer, let’s try Santorini. This hidden jewel of the southern beaches has a secluded location, so it’s great for partying into the early hours!

Image sources cited beneath each.

via Theros Wave Bar

via Theros Wave Bar

via Santorini Weddings

via Santorini Weddings

via June Bug Weddings

via June Bug Weddings

Tenuta Casteani, Tuscany

Guys, I’ve saved the best for last because when I stumbled upon this place, I honestly shouted. It’s so stunning - Set amongst the hills of the Italian countryside, with views to die for (and that’s before we even mention the wine!)

Images courtesy of the venue.

Are you planning a destination wedding? Make sure your stationery lives up to the beauty of your venue and get in touch about completely bespoke designs for your big day.

Rainy Wedding Ideas

I know, I know - Rain on your wedding day would be a disaster, right? Personally I love all that winter has to bring, including a storm (but I realise I’m unique in this!). With all the wet weather we’re having recently, I’ve put together some ideas for those planning for rain on their big day.

by unsplash.com/@jonathanborba

Umbrellas (obvs)

I mean, its the go-to first choice to protect you from the rain. But you can also make it a big part of the aesthetic of the day. You could choose a rainbow, your chosen colours, or transparent ones might be best if your ceremony is outdoors, so everyone can see what’s going on! And if it doesn’t rain? Who cares - There’s a beautiful canopy of brollies. They could be given out as favours or rented for the day from somewhere like Brolliesgalore!

via onefabday.com

via weddingwowfactor.co.uk

Wellies

For you, for the decorations, for the signage. If you’re getting married in the UK it might just rain, so make it your theme!

via wedding-venues.co.uk

via whimsicalwonderlandweddings.com

via offbeatbride.com/church-wedding-decor/

via carinabcouture.com/

via youandyourwedding.co.uk/

via englishlakes.co.uk

Raincoats and jackets

Style it up and show the rain who’s boss by embracing the waterproofs!

via fivediscover.com

via crystalrainmac.co.uk

via instagram.com/weddingwire

Pre-hot-booze rain dance (for the brave)

Yes, it’s a thing. Ok, so I just made it up, but hear me out. Get your guests to run out in the rain with you. The photographer can get some amazing stormy shots, puddle splashes and screams, and then you can all come back in to a table of blankets, mirrors for hair-and-make-up-checks, Bailey’s hot chocs, Tuthilltown Toddys or even mulled wine. Throw in some cookies, and what the hell, some shots. It’s a party!

by Schilling Photography via wilkieblog.com

via ohbestdayever.com

via weddingwire.com

by Ivan Zamanuhin via 500px.com

via womansjournal.lonnyblogs.ru

via rockmywedding.co.uk

Offbeat catering ideas

If you’re having a less traditional wedding which doesn’t include a long formal sit-down meal, you still want to be able to provide some delicious, interesting alternatives to feeding and entertaining your guests. I’ve tried, tested and scoured to find these catering ideas that will not only fill your guests up, but really wow them too!

Grazing tables

A grazing table is a stunning spread of delicious food that is set up for the whole event, meaning your guests can pick and choose what they want and continue to eat throughout the day. This is a great option if you have some drinkers at your reception, too, as it’ll keep them chomping and balancing out the booze!

Companies like Berry + Brie and Grape & Fig specialise in bringing you nourishing, stunning cuisine and keeping it looking and tasting fresh. And just think of the photos!

via berryandbrie.com

via grapeandfig.com

Street food trucks

Coco Dining rustles up the best of street food under one (super cute van) roof. Think Bahn Mi, burgers, fish and chips and burritos. They’d be great for a vintage flair, casual wedding.

If you’re looking for something homey and delicious, you could try The Cheese Truck. Serving up tasty toasties from your basic cheddar through to a goats’ cheese, honey, walnut and rosemary butter concoction that’s frankly making me want an early lunch right now.

via instagram.com/thecheesetruck/

via cocodining.co.uk

Bring-your-own

This may be too unusual for some, but it can make for a beautifully intimate wedding idea that really brings people together. You may be uncomfortable with guests paying for their food, or it might be a great way of keeping to a budget. I think the community-feel around breaking bread together, especially when it’s been made by the people there at the table, is really special.

via momontimeout.com/best-homemade-baked-mac-and-cheese-recipe/

via justapinchrecipes.blogspot.com/2019/04/fresh-fig-prosciutto-and-arugula-salad.html

via thesweetandsimplekitchen.com/raspberry-jam-filled-donuts-with-vanilla-sugar/

Drinks and cocktails

Nelson + Pops have a beautiful prosecco van and you can even personalise it to have your names and wedding theme. Ideal!

via nelsonandpops.co.uk

via instagram.com/nelsonandpops

What’s a summer celebration without a Pimms? And you can get your very own Pimms Pop Up Bar - either in a traditional format, by tricyle or phone box! - from Quirky Group. I love this bold aesthetic!

via quirky-group.co.uk/pimms-bars

via quirky-group.co.uk/pimms-bars

via quirky-group.co.uk/pimms-bars

Sweet treats

I’m not sure what it says about me that this section is longer than the others, but there are a few shout-outs to YUMMY companies that I just have to make!

Humble Crumble make hearty, sumptuous fillings with delish crunchy, crumbly toppings that are just too good to miss. They could be the dessert at your reception, or a great nibble for later on.

Another too-good-to-miss treat is the mini pavlovas by Meringue Girls. They’re scrummy, can be made into colours and flavours to fit your wedding and are so photogenic!

If you’re having a bonfire as part of your wedding, it’d be a cute ideas to give out S’mores as favours. Later on, when cosying up by the fire, guests can crack out the marshmallows and melt themselves a dream of a snack. The Knot have put together a helpful DIY guide.

Have you ever had a baklava ice cream sandwich? You can stuff yourself silly with them if you book Darlish, the Persian ice cream cart!

via humblecrumblelondon.co.uk/

via meringuegirls.co.uk/shop/rainbow-pavlovas/

via theknot.com/content/diy-smores-favors

via darlish.com

Whatever you choose, I’d really recommend a tasting session first. This not only allows you to make sure you’re making the right decision, but you get to treat yourself to some lovely food, so it really is a win-win. Happy snacking!

5 Things I Wish I'd Known When Planning My Wedding

Unless you’re an event planner - and even when you are - the process of planning the biggest celebration of your life so far can be overwhelming to say the least. Sure, there’s a list of things you can use to structure the planning. Dress - tick. Venue - tick. Music - tick. Cake - tick. Stationery - 😉- tick. You know the score.

Still, I felt like planning my wedding was a huge learning curve - Who I can rely on, how to herd cats, and how to balance lots of suppliers at once. Here’s my Top 5 Tips from what I experienced:

1 Choose the right photographer

We knew we wanted a documentary-style with candid interactions, magic moments and a cool, urban aesthetic. We found someone who had a very impressive portfolio, but on the day, his heart was no where near being in it. As a result, we don’t have any of our photos printed and displayed around our house. Even nearly 3 years on, thinking about that experience still upsets me!

Since becoming a wedding supplier myself, I’ve interacted with many AMAZING photographers. The best ones really get to know you as a couple, and they’re absolutely passionate about capturing your relationship, your family and the - dare I say it - magic of your day fo’ real. If I could go back in time, I’d shop around and really make sure we had made the right choice. You only get to do the day once!

Here are some of my top recommendations. These photographers all have the personality and the skills to shoot your big day:

Sidey Clark

Lex Fleming

Joanna Bongard

by sideyclark.com

by https://www.joannabongard.com

2 Understand your venue

Our venue was awesome - If I do say so myself. Think bare brick, glass ceilings, botanical plants and, I kid you not, a giant prop room to dip in to and decorate with. The staff were amazing, the location was perfect, and they made the day fantastic fun.

As big fans of live music, a huge part of our plans revolved around having a band to play in the evening. The dance floor and the bar were either side of some french doors.

When planning this out we underestimated two things: Firstly, some people there hadn’t seen each other for years. They wanted to catch up, and they did that where it wasn’t so loud. Secondly, people like to drink at weddings. That seems obvious, but it meant that the band were playing to a couple of people, rather than the masses, because most people hung out near the source. 🍷

My advice: Make sure you think about how each part of your day and night will work. Factor in your guests’ needs, rather than what you want them to do, and things will be much more relaxed!

by Rebecca Douglas Photography, via cocoweddingvenues.co.uk

3 Try a bit of everything

You get one chance to play the ‘I’m engaged!’ card, so use it to really experience some different options. For example, I was in the very fortunate position that my lovely step-mum made my wedding dress. It was beautiful, and exactly what I wanted. Since my friends have got engaged, though, I feel like I missed out on going to a bridal boutique. I never tried on a wedding dress in a shop, drank that free prosecco, waltzed in and out of a changing room in loads of different styles, and now I never will. Moreover, my mum, bridesmaids and Nanna missed out because I refused to get on board.

At the end of the day, I loved what I wore and I felt great. That’s all a bride could want! But if I could give myself some advice back then, it would have been not to shy away from experiences because they made me self-conscious and just embrace a nice day out. 👰

My best friend didn’t want a hen because they’re expensive, a political minefield and ultimately in her view, a big fuss. We went away for the weekend - we, the bridesmaids and her - and we knew that actually, she’d enjoy a cheeky tiara and a game of Mr & Mrs. She also didn’t factor in that making a fuss of her was no biggie for us - We love her! She was so happy with the little surprises we planned. She’s admitted since that life is just better wearing the tiara too, so I think that’s a win for hen-dos!

There may be elements of your day that you think ‘I don’t need that’ - and it’s good to know what you want. Just don’t write yourself out of fun because you think you don’t deserve it.

via rockmywedding.co.uk

4 You can’t control it all - and you shouldn’t!

Retrospectively, I wonder how may brides think about how involved their partner felt when planning the wedding. I know my husband would’ve liked to have been more involved, but I had this tunnel-vision about the aesthetic, the atmosphere, the-who-what-where of it all and honestly, I didn’t really let him in all that much. This is my biggest regret regarding wedding planning.

If you need a hand, I’d really recommend a great professional like Laura or Union, who will allow you to focus on your fiancé(e) and not stupid things, like which forks to choose!

I had all these irrational fears about my wedding day - Random people turning up, red wine down my dress, fights, no food! Well, none of that happened, but there were a few accidents and mishaps I hadn’t even imagined. The long and short of that is, I wasted time and positive energy fearing things I couldn’t control. On the day, things happened that weren’t planned for, but we cracked on and the day was still the best. Embrace the good, forget the bad, try to have some fun.

by pixiesinthecellar.co.uk

5 Make it personal

Lots of people want to feel involved and special at your wedding, but cut out all the pomp and you’re simply left with two people who love each other. Focus, always, on that. Don’t compromise what you both want, and stick together as a team. Make sure you and your guests look around and think, ‘This is so them/us’.

Venues, bands, photographers - They are great at weddings because they do it a LOT. Make sure yours isn’t the same as the next one and that things are sentimental and special to the two of you.

A great place to start is your guests’ first glance - Your Save the Dates. Get in touch if you need a hand and we can capture what you want for your day - and your marriage - in a design just for you.

by throughthewoodsweran.co.uk